Understanding the Smart-Lazy Continuum

“Progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things” ~ Robert A. Heinlein

An important lesson I learned in the Army is that if you have a vile, hateful job that must be done— hand it off to the laziest smart person in the unit and they will figure out the fastest right way to get 'er done.

This is a careful balancing act. If you have someone who is lazy but stupid they will come up with easy solutions that turn out worse than the problem they were trying to solve (See, Bush, GW and Iraq War). On the other hand, if you have someone who is brilliant but too energetic they won’t be motivated to look for the most efficient way to do things. They might get off on taking 3 hours to do something that could be accomplished in 45 minutes.

Here’s a diagram that illustrates this concept. Remember, you need the proper balance of smart vs. lazy to achieve maximum efficiency.

It has been my delight to be the laziest smart person in every job, both military and civilian, I’ve ever held. As a lowly private on a punishment detail I was tasked with removing 7 layers of old linoleum from the barracks floor. They gave me a screwdriver and a hammer. Are you kidding, me? It took me about 10 minutes to figure out I needed a blowtorch and a putty knife. Bam! — One fully stripped floor. Today, I have macros on my computer to do everything but go to the bathroom for me.

On the other hand, inefficiency makes me crazy. This was even true when I was a kid. I tried to play Barbies with the girls (mostly because that meant playing with the girls) but I always gave up halfway through the first wardrobe change. Trying to make those little shoes stay on tiny feet made me want to kill someone. I always quit and went to read or outside to play baseball, instead.

You might be fooled into thinking that I’ve gotten over that aversion because the Rusty Patti / Gray Shade action figure has multiple outfits.


I have a confession to make. But be WARNED: Some might find these images disturbing.

Three action figures — Three outfits — One head
The perfect balance of smart to lazy.

I wish I could teach you this skill, but as Dagwood Bumstead pointed out, “You can't teach people to be lazy - either they have it, or they don't.”

[originally posted on LezBang]